When life gives you lemons….

GRAB THEM!!! What a weird day yesterday was, to say the least. My husband’s ex wife (the one who originally split us up 22 years ago – oh Karma, I love thee dearly!) had removed me off her Facebook friends list. Now, as I am sure you can imagine, I was crying. Yes, tears of laughter were rolling down my face when I found out! Bearing in mind, I have done nothing but try to keep her in contact with Myles, managed to get Leigh over when he was younger to spend a whole Christmas with his Dad and Myles (something they hadn’t ever done). I let my 2 go to their Dad’s house too that day so lay in bed on my own watching Supernatural crying like a baby but it was the medication and I am not budging on that one!

I went off on a tangent (hah!). So, Ann, Bert’s ex wife sent me a message on Whatsapp yesterday and returned to my Facebook- wooo! Lucky me! In fairness, I got a polite congratulations, thanks for looking after her son and I though that was pretty much it. Until later on the stinger came. Now, this is quite complicated so bear with me. Ann has 2 children with Bert – Leigh and Myles. She has another, Liam, to her second husband who is now in his father’s custody, and yet another, Kieran to her on/off ‘boyfriend’. Bearing in mind she is the same age as me, and Kieran is 2 you get the picture. Just an aside, Bert and I are the only people to have had all 4 of them under the same roof at the same time- go figure. Incidentally, I have known Ann since I was 13 so the haters can get behind me, I was there first!

She asked me to call her yesterday, which I duly did. Turns out she is in court next month for custody of Kieran and things are NOT looking good for her. So, she has asked me to take parental responsibility for Myles, properly and through the lawyers. Hell, if it was up to Myles, he wants me to adopt him but I have explained that I can’t. She wants me to do it so that it hopefully looks good on her that she is making provisions for her other children, but has played right into our hands and given us what we wanted.

Yup, wasn’t expecting that one. In fairness, she was very upset on the phone and even though I founded the ‘ We hate Ann’ fan club 26 years ago, I still found it upsetting to hear her like that so we had a good old chat. It has been decided that Leigh will come back to us sooner rather than later, I will have parental responsibility for Myles (Leigh doesn’t need it due to his age) and that should anything happen to Liam’s family he will come and live with us. I am a mother and I KNOW it must have been hard for her to do this.

When Bert came home, he was gobsmacked at what had happened. Myles is ecstatic as he (and this is a very hard thing to write, but to quote him) ‘hates her’. Now, I was privately educated so I have a couple of friends who are lawyers so gave one a quick call and she told me to grab it with both hands, and not let go. She is one smart cookie, so I am going to go along with her advice, and she has offered to do our side of the paperwork with Ann’s lawyer. If I drank it would be champagne all round!!

Do you know what? For someone that is bedridden a lot of the time due to various medical conditions, my life can be quite interesting! We have nicknamed our bedroom Mission Control and even from here, in my state, all 4 of our children call me the lynchpin of the family. I personally think it is Bert, but they see it differently. I am their confidante, study buddy, bank, you name it!

I will leave you with some of my own particular brand of what I find funny. I am missing 7 teeth. Joshua and Elizabeth’s father knocked them out of me years ago and I can’t afford to get them redone (I do have a plate for special occasions but hate wearing it). Last night, Captain Epilepsy struck with a vengeance of epic proportion. I think by the time Bert got to me we were on about #8 so out came the Midazolam. Now, when I seize, I curl up to the right and then go into the tonic/clonic phase of the seizure cycle. Only this time I had broken a tooth and cut the inside of my cheek! So when it was all over, Bert threw me onto my back to give me said Midazolam and I looked like a cross between Carrie and The Joker. As Bert has to film my seizures I think George Romero would have been proud of the outcome! And it was frothy too! All I am going to say is praise be for M&S washable and tumble dryable pillows!!

I have never asked to see the film clips as I have normally forgotten about them, but this time I asked to see them. Not going to do it again as I have to admit, as a fully trained RNLD, I cried when I saw what my family has to see on a daily basis. So today I am going to write myself up a care plan, which is going to be designed to have as little impact on the family as possible as I did NOT like what I saw, and plus, it will get my old grey matter flowing in the right direction.

Today I am going to give thanks for Ann coming to her senses and doing right by her son, and giving me that gift even though it must have hurt her.

So on a seizure count of about 12 by the time I had finished, a mini horror film and a broken tooth, I shall bid thee adeiu

Sarah

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